“Samantha is Back”

July 15 2006 Saturday Tucson AZ


There is a pretty bird whistle. One bird has such a pretty melodious sound. It is a pleasure to hear.


I saw Samantha yesterday at the Catalina pool. Before I moved over to swim club I had become close to Samantha. She had been Assistant Head Lifeguard and then Head Lifeguard at Fort Lowell pool when we swam there all the time before we switched to swim club. I was not close to her the way you are with a regular person because she was always up in the lifeguard stand. But when I finished my swim and Bill was still swimming I would tread water and chit-chat with Samantha up on her lifeguard stand. I guess after enough of these chit-chats an abiding affection grows.


When we came back to the public pools in mid-May I asked “is Samantha still in charge at Fort Lowell?” And I was told Samantha had taken an internship at Disney World in Florida, but she had recently returned to Tucson, but wasn’t back at Fort Lowell. I hadn’t seen her in all this time, but yesterday while I was swimming, Jimmy, who is in charge of all the pools and presides over the Catalina Pool, walked out of the lifeguard room and into the supply room and with him was a young blond I recognized as Samantha. She was in her street clothes. I called out “Samantha” two times, but when she did not respond, I thought maybe it wasn’t Samantha, but I decided to move into the first lane so I could get closer look when she got out. When she came out I studied her and I thought “maybe it is not Samantha and that is why she did not respond,” and just when I was going to keep swimming, she yelled out “Anne!” in an excited voice, it was Samantha.


Nobody has yelled out “Anne!” in an excited voice since I have been in Tucson. Working with New Yorkers and falling in love with them and being best friends with them at Disney World, had changed Samantha’s personality. New Yorkers scream out your name in an excited voice when they are overjoyed to see you, but it is just not the way things are done here out West. Even tho Sam has lived in Tucson her whole life, except those 6 months in Florida with New Yorkers, it was enough. Fourteen years in Tucson has turned this New Yorker into Tucson, and 6 months with New Yorkers turned Sam New York. We had switched places. I was just as excited to see her, but I was western low key in my expression, she wasn’t. Her whole expression had turned New York City emotional. It was so much fun. And so familiar to me. When she said, it was time to leave, she had become so close to her New York friends, she sobbed, and she made sobbing face to go with it. Westerners don’t express themselves dramatically and don’t make dramatic faces to show the feeling. They say “I was really sorry to leave them” and don’t make a face. They don’t say “I sobbed and sobbed” and make a sobbing face.


My Samantha was transformed. Not only that, she had her long hair up in a chignon, and looked totally sophisticated-- glamorous and sophisticated. Sam is a beauty but that glamour and sophistication was pure New York. I wonder if half the reason she was so delighted to see me was because it was re-link to her New York friends. Sam always knew I was a New Yorker but it wasn’t real to her till she came back from Florida and left her New York friends behind.


But Sam did not like Florida. She had come back two months before her internship was done. She loved her New York friends, but could not understand why working at Disneyworld was so different from being in Tucson. “You know how we are here in Tucson” Sam said, “I said hi to everyone, and no one said hi to me; and then I noticed in the staff cafeteria, everyone sits with the people they know, and they don’t talk to anyone else, it took me a long time to figure it out.” Sam described this as “culture shock.” And she said she was really far away from her family. Sam is very very very close to her family. She didn’t realize how far away she would be, even tho her mom visited several times.


I understood what she was saying, it is 3000 miles away, it is far distance, and psychologically too, you feel it. She was used to visiting Los Angeles and hadn’t realized how different it would be. I think it was more crowded too. She said “here, there is a psychological space we all give each other, which wasn’t so there.” And she was unnerved by the swamps and idea of alligators coming to get her. Altho she loves the beaches and the ocean. Because her mother had suggested she stick it out, I get the impression that when she was there, the bad overwhelmed the good, but now that she is back, all the good has risen to forefront of her mind.


“It’s good you bought that 800 dollar pocketbook which was reduced to $150, you needed a classy pocketbook for back East” I said. “I bought two more while I was there, a pink and purple one, and a brown one.” “Did you do a lot of shopping there?” I asked. “I wanted to but I didn’t have the money. I saw some really nice shoes, pink high-heels with bows, they were sooooo cute I really wanted them.” “Pink high-heels with bows!” I squealed, “O Sam they sound so cute, I guess you could have put them on your credit card.” “No I couldn’t” she said, “my charge card is maxed out.”


Tucson is just a way station for her now. I knew in my own bones she would stay for a while and go on to Los Angeles, that is where she really wants to go. And she said, “I’m going to Los Angeles.” “And soon” she said. I figure soon will be 6 months from now. She pulled up stakes and left once. Even tho it didn’t work out, it was like a dress rehearsal. She is staying at her parents’ house, I don’t know if she will get her own place again, they are all so delighted to have Sam back and she is so delighted to be there. And she will make the same arrangement with Jimmy, a leave of absence, when she does go off to California. I knew when police academy in Tucson turned her down last summer, Samantha has a destiny. Because everything about Samantha is exactly what the police force wants. No one in this world is as calm capable and sensible as Samantha. She had been accepted by police academy and was all ready to start next day, when at the very last minute they found she had a speeding ticket in California 8 years ago, and they rejected her. It was the first time Sam was rejected for anything, she was stunned, and she was mad about it. But I knew it was destiny taking a hand, she wasn’t meant to be cop in Arizona, she has another destiny.


Sam belongs in show business, she is a major talent. She does not have a show business personality, she is just incredibly talented at singing dancing acting, everything. She is an incredible performer. Maybe it’s good her New York experience in Florida, it made Sam more outgoing. She was always outgoing in a Tucson way, but now there is a NYC gloss over it. All Sam needs is to be discovered by a talent scout. I really can’t explain the NYC gloss that Sam has now, it is so subtle-- but it is transforming. I would describe it as it makes Sam look more womanly. But what it is, is a heightened focus. The bird has left the nest. Sam returned from her back East experience poised on eagle wings.... and she will fly far that girl... it is her destiny…