“Ted’s birthday party”

Tucson painting by Felix Pasilis
6:20 am, Sunday, June 8, 2008
“Ted’s birthday party”
(his wife invited all the people in the Tucson Ron Paul meet up group)

Yesterday was Ted’s birthday party. His wife gave him the party. It was in their backyard behind their house. And you could say in some ways it was the loveliest party I have ever been to. She had a lot of food she had prepared set out buffet-style on tables when you first entered the yard, right behind the house. And it was all such perfect food. Just exactly what you love to eat, and exactly suited for the time of day and the weather. She even had delicious iced tea already sweetened and lemoned as one of the assortment, huge assortment, of soft drinks. She just had everything. It was like a fairy land. If you arrived in Heaven and there was a picnic party to greet you, and all you had to do was to desire something, anything, and it was immediately in an attractive bowl to help yourself right in front of you, that is what Jacqui's party was like. Except you didn’t have to figure out what your heart’s desire was, Jacqui had figured it out for you, it was all there. And she is so talented at food preparation, everything she prepared was just perfect. I don’t know how she did it. She is just a genius hostess. And she must love her husband very much to make such a nice party for him, that is a true labor of love. And her backyard likewise, was set out perfectly for the party. Her talent must extend to home-making to have a backyard like that. There may have been two tables, but the table where I sat down, a nice big comfortable rectangular table, was solid, big, and had some kind of tiles as its table top, maybe ceramic tiles, very attractive and comfortable and inconspicuous. And very comfortable chairs to sit in and comfortable chairs like that all over the yard. And another table, maybe slightly smaller, just like that too. It is her touch again, nothing conspicuous, just your heart’s desire without even realizing it is your heart’s desire, just that it fits perfectly.

Her husband said “Annie!” when I arrived, he figured out it was me. He was standing in middle of yard near buffet table. He was younger than I thought he would be, young and vibrant and handsome, and happy. A wife like that, and who loves him so much, how could he not be happy. And those eyes! You could see in his eyes, how it was that he sent an email to everyone in the Ron Paul meet-up group in Tucson, asking them to become a precinct committeeman, and as a result I did! The energy in those eyes was tremendous, the boldness. I guess you could call him a leader. It is a different kind of leader than Jacqui, where the responsibility for making all those people perfectly comfortable was squarely on her shoulders. And she did it! Magnificently! He is the leader of a movement, that is something else. But he does it with as much ease and grace as his wife does hostess, it fell so easily and naturally on his shoulders, without effort or strain, just like his wife. Two totally exceptional people who simply naturally express what it is to be human. He is friendly warm easy-to-talk-to generous and kind.

Jim and I got lost going there which made the trip 5 or 6 times as long. We could have gone there and back 6 times in the time it took to find it, and it is not close by. It could be 10 miles away, easily. I hadn’t bothered to read the directions on the email because when I told Jim the address, 7901 East Manitoba Street, he said “I know where that is.” So all I wrote down was Ted’s name and the address. I didn’t write down his phone number or the directions because Jim was born here and grew up here, he really does know where places are, and as he said as we were driving along to get there (this is before we got lost)-- he said “I used to be a gas man, so all I did was find addresses.” Jim worked for the gas company in Tucson, when there is a problem and you call the gas company and they dispatch a technician to your house, day and night, Jim was the one dispatched. So naturally since Jim had said “I know where it is” on the phone, and said “I used to be gas man, all I did was find addresses,” it never crossed my mind we would be lost for 2 hours and almost have to give up and come home.

He actually was familiar with Manitoba Street and had an idea of where it would be, and when we got as far East as the 7900 block he did turn South to find it. We began off on the right track. But I guess he didn’t go far South enough, because when he didn’t find it, he tried to backtrack north again. He decided it must not be this far south, and must be further north. But he turned onto a big street which looped around everything, which went in a wide circle, and then he began turning north, and we went all the way north to Speedway without finding it. We really had driven for an hour now, and instead of getting closer to it, we were hopelessly lost, had no idea where it was. He said he should take me back home so I could get Ted’s phone number, and I said we should stop at a convenience store so we could look at a map. “They won’t let you look at the map” he said “you’ll have to buy it! we’ll go back to my house and look up Mapquest on the computer, I have a computer now.”

We passed a gas station on every corner and I kept saying “can’t we ask at the gas station where Manitoba Street is?” And he said “those aren’t real gas stations they are just convenience stores, they don’t know anything.” “We have his full name and address, can’t you call on your cell phone for Directory Information and get his phone number?” “What is Directory Information?” he asked. “OK” I said, “take me to a pay phone and I will call directory information.” So he found one outside a convenience store in a parking lot. “How much is a pay phone these days, is it still a quarter” I asked Jim. “I don’t know” he said, “but they’ll return your money.” It turned out to be 50 cents. But then I saw written on it “for directory information dial 1 and 411, and deposit 65 cents.” Which brought me to nothing at all, and my money didn’t come back. So then I pressed operator, and finally someone came on, and I told her. And then a supervisor came on and I told him, and he said he is very sorry, but directory information is 555-1212. And I said “I don’t have another 50 cents, can you return my money” and he said “I am very sorry I can’t do that but I can take your name and address.” And I said “my friend is right here with a cellphone, what does he call?” And the man said “he can call 411.” The operator supervisor was very nice to me and very sympathetic. I told him “we have been driving around in circles for an hour, we can’t find it and now I want to call and get his phone number so I can ask him.” He was tremendously sympathetic about driving around in circles and that I lost my 65 cents and could not reach directory information and there was no way he could connect me to it. So then Jim called 411 on his cell phone and he was told it was an unlisted number. I guess that is when we hit bottom, we had reached total frustration.

I think Jim wanted to give up and go home. “We can’t keep driving around at 4 dollar gallon gas, I will run out of gas.” And I still had the idea somewhere in my mind that we had to find Manitoba Street, that the logical thing is to find Manitoba Street and then the address on it, 7901. Jim kept insisting I had written it down wrong and our whole problem is it must be 7109. This is the second time I got lost with Jim and after he said he knew where it is, so I didn’t write down directions. And the first time I accepted it, when he said it was my fault, I wrote it down wrong. But this time I didn’t! I knew I had just copied it from Ted’s email and I had copied it right.

So again we set off blindly. “I know where 7500 is,” he said, “we'll go along there.” And he said “I do have some idea where Manitoba Street is, I remember it, I have an idea where it is.” So he drove west somewhere, till he decided to go south, and then we went south a great distance, we were around the air force base. And Jim kept saying “I know where Manitoba Street is.” And then we turned east, to get near 7900, and Jim with his great eyesight, like a hawk, said “there it is, that must be the party.” I don’t know how he did it. He found Manitoba Street he found the house, he found it all in one fell swoop! “How do you know that is the party?” He said “the gate is open, it must be in the back yard, I heard the sounds of the party, and there are the cars.” So we parked and went thru the gate and walked into the middle of back yard.

And a very nice young man standing up right there said “Annie!!” I said “yes, are you Ted?” and he said “yes.” And I said “this is Jim he drove me, he is the one who changed his registration so he could sign my petition and vote for me.” Jim was so concerned about not knowing anyone there, and was he really invited, that I wanted to say right from the get-go how helpful Jim was to the cause. Ted had really really really wanted me to be pc (precinct committeeman) and Jim had made it all possible to happen.

I was so thirsty by now, and Ted’s wife put ice in a glass, and I poured 7 Up on it and got one for Jim. I discovered there was food and put a sandwich on my plate and one for Jim. And then you could say the party began for us. Everyone else had not gotten lost, had shown up on time, and were now finished eating. Jim got into conversation right away with a very nice young man, standing up by buffet table, the guy Ted had been talking to when we arrived. So I took my plate and drink over to one of the picnic tables.

And I immediately told the woman sitting on my left how we had gotten lost. I was very amused that Jim a native of Tucson, plus a gas man expert at finding addresses, had been lost for two hours. Plus it is so different from Bill. Before we go anywhere he gets out the map, knows exactly where we are going. He never wings anything, everything is done with meticulous care ahead of time. As I told the girl next to me, “I am not meticulous like my husband, I am more wing-it, but I’m not as extreme as Jim.” In fact I like having an idea where something is, I don’t have to be exact about it. Which I guess is what Jim thought he had, but hadn’t, but then turned out he had. She was a lovely attractive very nice woman and the man she was sitting with was not her husband, because when he returned with two beers, they both told each other they had never tasted this one before. A woman at the other end of the table was doing all the talking, and the attractive woman and the man she was sitting with, were listening. The man next to the attractive woman (his name turned out to be Pat) asked the talkative girl when she moved to Tucson, and she said “4 years ago.” And he said “where did you live before?” And she said “Yuma.” And she said her husband is in the Marines for 20 years, I guess he just retired, so they had lived in lots of places. She looked and seemed like a bouncing happy friendly girl but she made poor impression on me. Because apparently she works at Desert Museum now. That is off in the mountains in the desert east of Tucson, I was there once, with all the animals of the desert there (a desert zoo) and big parking lot. She said if someone arrives with their dog (I guess no dogs are allowed to come in) and leaves their dog in car in parking lot, the guard calls Humane Society, they take away your dog, and you have to go up before a judge to try to get your dog back, and it is not so easy. The reason for this is because summer heat has arrived on the desert. I really have a problem with this. In Tucson they take away your children and they take away your dog, and you can’t get them back, if you leave them in the car when it is desert heat. When we first moved here we took our dog Clio with us everywhere, she wanted to go, and she would curl up on seat, we left the windows open, when we went into a store. I guess we were just lucky they did not take Clio away from us and refuse to give her back.

It was deeply weird for me to be at a party which I thought was libertarians for Ron Paul and have a woman endorse this policy. (Maybe she is a relative or friend.) Why else would I run for precinct committeeman if I didn’t want to get rid of all the laws in Arizona which take away your pets, your children, and your liberty!

Pat, himself, turned out to be Precinct Chairman. “O!” I said so excited “you are my precinct chairman, I am precinct committeeman, so what is the idea behind all this? we are going to do a revolution and take over the Republican party?”

He said there are various groups in the Republican Party, but most all want lower taxes and less government restriction. And Tucson is nearly all Democratic voters and our goal is to get people to vote Republican to get Republicans into office. “O” I said “O.” I thought to myself, ‘I can’t believe I am doing all this just to elect Republicans, if that is what this is all about, why am I doing it! And the whole idea that I would try to entice someone who likes to vote for Democrats to vote for a Republican seemed absurd to me. I don’t believe in trying to change anyone’s mind.’ I was completely confused.

So then I tried to talk to the man on my right, I didn’t want him to feel left out. There was an ashtray there and I asked if it would be ok if I smoked cigarette? And you have to give that man credit. He said “I have had asthma since I was 3 or 4 years old, smoke is the worst thing for me, but I joined the smokers rights group, because I believe smokers should have rights and their rights should not be taken away from them.” And he told me the logo for the smokers’ rights group is a dove smoking a cigarette. I told him “I love that logo, because I love doves and I smoke cigarettes, and I want to see the picture, is it on the internet?” And he said “Yes, just look up smokers rights alliance.” And I said “I give you great credit for putting your money where your mouth is, I never met anyone before who acted on their principles like you.”

And then I decided to get a little more food. The conversation had changed to politics, which is a conversation I like and I am interested in. I would have liked to hear what they all had to say, and to say my two cents too. But when I went to get more food the guy Jim had been talking to had left. So Jim said “I’m tired and I want to leave.” I said “can I eat a little more food first?” But he looked at my plate and said “all that! it will take long time.” So instead I just heaped up my plate, I thought “I will take it home for Bill and I will drink my iced tea and eat my delicious coconut ices in the car.”

So I brought the heaped-up plate to the car, put it on seat under steering wheel, and when I returned Jim was now in conversation with Ted. Ted said he is libertarian so he will vote for Bob Barr. And he and Jim got into big conversation about trucks and diesel and getting tickets for noise and I don’t know, car talk I guess. I was just standing around, drinking my iced tea, waiting for Jim to leave. I hadn’t been quite ready to leave when Jim said “time to go.” I was ready to have my dessert, a little more food and my iced tea at table and talk about politics. But when Jim said time to leave, I never returned to table, I stood around and waited for him to be ready to go, but now that he was enjoying his conversation he didn’t want to go.

It’s interesting. I am so used to Bill and how he does thing, and having a rhythm with Bill, and him understanding me and me understanding him. And I like things to be clear. Either we are leaving, in which case we leave. Or we are staying, in which case I make myself comfortable eating my food, sit at table, and partake in conversation. This in-between thing, leaving and not leaving, standing around, waiting to leave, is not how I like to do things. I guess Jim got bored when he had no one to talk to, so he wanted to leave, and then when he enjoyed his conversation with Ted he didn’t want to leave.

At the table I had asked, “who is here? is it Ron Paul people plus Ted and Jacqui’s friends?” And they said “yes, about half and half.” The woman next to me, and maybe Pat too, said they had met Ted in the Ron Paul group, but then had become friends.

Finally Jim was ready to leave. So I thanked Ted and said what a wonderful party it was and to please thank his wife for me. And she was getting out the birthday cake, it said “Happy Birthday Ted” on it, she is such a sweetheart.

And Jim and I drove home very fast, long beautiful route, as Sun was going down. “That was a very nice party” I said. And he said “I’m not going to go to the art gallery on Sunday.” The plan had been for Jim to take me, we would stay an hour. Because Layla’s show turned out to be a group show. It is at Dahlia’s gallery all the way down town. And Layla had asked if Bill wanted to be in the show, and to call Dahlia and mention her name if he did. And Bill had brought down 10 paintings and Dahlia chose 4 which will be in the show next Sunday. And Dahlia even had Bill sign a contract, a 3 month contract, that she can sell the paintings at 60-40. And she took photos of two of them and put them on her website with the other art she has contracted to sell.

This show is a huge deal to Bill. Other than student shows at the art colleges he has been in in Tucson he has never had his work in a show. And Layla is a great artist, and likewise Jerry, whose metal sculpture will be in it. Jerry is a great artist. Bill is in very good company. This is a tremendous thing.

Bill will want to be there the whole time plus help Dahlia clean up. I thought Jim would take me and we would stay an hour. But he said an hour is too long, he has no interest in looking at art, and he doesn’t want to drive all the way down to Stone Avenue. We’ll see what happens. Jim had agreed to take me to Ted’s birthday party because Bill had helped him with his car last week, drove him home from the garage and then to garage when car was ready. But apparently Jim had fallen asleep, he woke up and thought “holy shit! I am supposed to drive her to that birthday party” and had come right over.

I really have no idea why Jim decided he didn’t want to go to art gallery next Sunday. I think he had nice time at birthday party. He enjoyed very much the two people he talked to, he is a libertarian himself. He got to eat nice food, and it was pleasant in the backyard.

But maybe he thought I’d rather be home watching television, and he decided one big favor was enough, and he wasn’t going to take me to the art show....


Layla